The List

I thought I'd make a list of all the stuff I can do now that I couldn't do 6 months ago.

• Give Injections:
• Intradermal, Subq, Delt, Glut, and Z track
• Understand when each of them are appropriate
• Draw blood with a standard needle and butterfly needle from the arm and with the butterfly from the hand
• Understand how different vials for collecting blood have different additives, what order they need to be used in so not to contaminate each other and what to do with them.
• Obtain a urine specimen, spin the sediment out of it, and look at it under a microscope for identification.
• Perform an EKG and verify the heart rate by calculating from the reading.
• Look up Diagnosis and procedure codes in medical books for insurance reimbursement
• Use Electronic record software with confidence.
• Understand and calculate medications for dispensing.
• Create sterile packaging for medical tools
• Sterilize the tools using an autoclave
• Perform surgical hand washing and sterile gown/glove for surgery
• Irrigate and close a wound
• Remove sutures and surgical staples
• Bandage anything on the body using a variety of materials and techniques
• Create a sterile field for surgery
• Drape and prep a patient for minor surgeries
• Identify a wide variety of surgical instruments
• Do a Tuberculin skin test and interpret the results
• Catheterize a patient

I'm pretty proud of this list!

Speak up, please

We sometimes get matched up with lab partners via playing cards. Sets of cards are passed out and if you and another person have the same card then you're partners for the day.

Last term, the clique-y seniors would 'forget' they had my matching card, or other peoples. Irritating.

Today, I got my card. A 9.  


"Hey, who has 9?"

.....


"HEY, who has 9?"


..............

"Anyone got NINE?"

I hear a puff of air at my elbow. It's this big dude J, who doesn't take notes but instead says everything the teacher says under his breath.  He shows me his card.   9.

"Why didn't you say so?"
(whispers) "I was standing right there"

"Next time could you say something before I yell over the class 3 times?"

whisper "But I was right there...."

Ok.......
So I gave him 3 injections.

Quick Studies

Day #2 and my 4 are doing lots better at injections. They will probably be bored of it in a week.

"Junior" sequence

We started #2 of 3 back office classes today.  This time I was the teacher. I had 4 folks who were learning injections from me, and they did well.

I kept my word to myself to be open, kind, and welcoming. 

It was fun having people to tell what to do again. It's been a while!

This sequence is primarily injections, lab work, and lots of pharmacology.  I'm gonna be bizzy!

4.0 Secure

I've finished my third sequence, with a solid 97.3%.  Next sequence I'll be a junior (which is hilarious to me), and I'll have some new people with me that I'll be needing to tutor.

Since my experience coming into back office was a little strange, I'm going to make every effort to be welcoming and friendly to the new people. I remember how the clicky 'cool kids' just kind of stared at me.  I won't be doing that.

Time to cultivate that bubbly personality I've been hearing so much about!

Almost through 3rd Sequence

This 6 weeks has just flown by. Very busy, and I've learned so many great things!  Next sequence I'll be learning Urinalysis, EKGs, and other lab tests.

Bring it!

I got my first employment ping from a Dr. office today!  Woohoo!

Just when I thought it was safe....

So, my blood drawing is going better, learning new things, all is well.

There are a group of seniors - ones on their last sequence - that are in class with me.  Today we were being lectured on sterile technique and the subject of medical waste came up.

A senior asked what happens to all the needles and bloody gauze and things.  The teacher told us that it's all labeled medical waste,  and shipped to a facility where it's incinerated.

That same girl said "But, when it's burnt, if there is HIV or AIDS in it, and it goes up the chimney can't it get in the air and hurt people that way?"

WHAT!?!

This girl has been certified to have gone through HIV/AIDS certification! We all have had to watch videos, participate in lectures, take tests.... all of us.

I am aghast.

Language and Time Barrier

So, today the teacher was telling us how to set up the exam room for a complete head to toe physical.  Tools blah blah, pap smear, ok,  etc.

She said "The doctor may, depending on the age of a male patient, decide to do a digital rectal exam."

A bunch of the younger students looked confused  "How?"

Teacher "The doctor inserts a finger into the rectum to feel the prostate"

Student "How is that digital?"  I could see the student thought like a digital clock kind of thing

The teacher holds up her hand "These are called DIGITS"

Finally, injections!

Today, day 2 of my 3rd sequence, I finally got to do some injections!

I did 3,  an Intra Muscular, a Subcutaneous, and an Intradermal.

It's strange to do this with all of the protective equipment and new techniques, but the teacher commented that it was good that I have no fear.

What could make me afraid about sticking a little needle in someone?

I got my 3 shots too, we all had to do them all and so it's only right.  The good news is that I can only get 3 per day.

I'll post photos of it tomorrow.

Just for the taste of it.

So, start of a new sequence today, in the lab, with lots more students and 2 teachers. Time flew by and it was great to take vitals.

Tons of homework. OY.

LOL of the day, our teacher asked  "What's the difference between oral and rectal thermometers, aside from the taste"

EWWWWWWWW

Still A all the way

This is the final week of my 2nd sequence. I still have 98% or better on all of my grades, and am done with all of the work required for this class.

I'm excited to move on to the next sequence.  I think needles are in my forecast!

Tough Stuff

Some of my classmates are going through some really hard stuff.  Spousal abandonment, eviction, etc.

I'm sorry for them, I wish I could do something.

Tedious Term

This term is dreadfully tedious. All about the business side of medicine.  Insurance, coding, billing, filing, answering the phones.....omg.

BUT  there are only 4 of us in class, so we can gloss over things that all of us know (phones) and do more of the other stuff - like the electronic medical records that everyone has to be compliant with in 2014.

I still hear snippets of the people that made me crazy last term...... and shake my head.  Happy for snippets.

Long Lost Friend

Today was day 3 of my new sequence, which is mostly the administrative stuff of medical office life.  Our little class is just 4 of us, and the teacher is trying valiantly to stay on track even though it seems more like 5 ladies chatting than anything else.

Still homework and tests loom.

My old classmates were back in the main building today after their first 2 days in the animal annex. One of them spotted me and ran and hugged me like I was her birth mother or kidney donor.

I didn't think I'd left that much of an impression.

It was cute.

Done with Sequence 1

I will be so glad to put some of this extreme silliness behind me.

I was OVER IT. today.

Look at all these books

Now we'll see if you can teach an old dog new tricks!

CPR = Chronic Pain for Really old student

Today was 4 hours of CPR certification. On my knees and the floor.  My bendy bones don't enjoy this position at this time.

I can save your life, just give me a few days to recuperate!

Arrogant, Insecure, and Arrogant more

We finished up our presentations today, but not until the one I call "Too Cool For School" gets up and said:

'I didn't want to do a power point or a poster because that's just lame'

(nearly everyone before this one did either a power point or a poster)

"I did this in about 20 minutes last night so...."


Then we were treated to a video of two crudely made sock puppets in front of a white board. Talking about skin. For 5 full minutes.


I know what grade I would have given.

F-

A little bonus!

Before our final my teacher pulled me aside and told me that he showed my presentation to the school director, and many of the other teachers and staff saw it.  They were all very impressed. The director told my teacher that he really wanted to do something for me to show how amazed he was, and the teacher handed me a starbucks card!

How Nice!

Anyway, here are the photos of my work.  The Anatomy and Physiology final was today, I did well!

Presentation

My presentation went really well. The class participated, people laughed and were serious, and at the end come came up and told me about friends or family they had that needed help with alcohol.

The teacher asked me if he could keep it so he could show it to the director of the school.  That made me feel good.

:)

I made a sign today

Our teacher has been so patient and kind. Still, the whining is maddening.

I made a little sign today and flashed it at some whiners. They stopped.  


I win. We all Win. Teacher Wins.

Pucker Power

Our acting out people got the black and white view of their demerits today.  They were very silent and sullen as a result.

Hopefully, it will just give them a little push to not be so silly.

Yesterday we were assigned 3 chapters to read, and today we had a little math.  After a quick review the teacher sprung a pop test on us from the three chapters.

OH THE INSANE WHINING!!! IT WAS CRAZY!!!!


He let everyone off the hook after about 5 minutes, but they got a little scare.  Ha ha.

I'm pretty much all done with my school work for this sequence, and just a little polish on my presentation.

Still Solid A Territory.

My 3 tests today were good, I missed only two answers total across all 3.

More demerits were given out today, to the usual suspects.

Nothing too interesting or silly happened today, because it was Monday and all we did was take tests and study for tests.

Perhaps the silliness will resume tomorrow!

Hard Week Coming Up

I can't believe there are only 2 more weeks of this class.

I have 3 tests tomorrow, lectures, then 3 tests on Friday. I also have to be ready to give my presentation on Friday, although I may not be called until Monday. I'm just putting the connectors on my internal felt organs now.

Things are good. I'm looking forward to the intensive classes.  I can't wait to stick needles in people.

OH NO YOU DIDN'T SAY THAT!!!!

Ok, so yesterday the class was 13.  Today the class turned into a circus.  Talking about the urinary system, the teacher just gave a little warning and said "We all need to be adults here, this is a medical class and we're discussing the human body. I think that if I am discussing terms up here that you all should be able to handle it. I think you should be able to handle the words Penis and Vagina."


"OH, I CAN HANDLE A PENIS AND A VAGINA ALL RIGHT"


(**!!!  what !!!***)  everyone's jaw hit the floor.    The student I have nicknamed "Too cool for School" just blurted it out.

It was the first time that I thought the teacher was really going to snap someone back.

I'd have testified in his defense.

Facepalming SO Hard

I nearly gave myself whiplash today from the amount of Facepalming.


We had our math test, and overall people did much better than it sounded like they were going to do yesterday.

But the teacher said "Ok, Tomorrow is FRACTIONS"

The entire class complained and whined for 3 solid minutes. The Teacher stood there and for a second I thought he was going to just walk out the door.  I just looked at him in pity.


Later, we moved on to anatomy and physiology. Suddenly, half the class turned into 13 year old boys.  Really?  We don't know the proper term for Anus?

Oh man,  I'm seriously starting to question my place in this little world. When do I get to stick a needle in some of these kids?

and I thought Computer Basics was 'basic'

We started math today.  Basic Math.

ba.sic.

The level of panic in some of my classmates voices grieved me even more than it did for computer stuff

The teacher LITERALLY  wrote this on the board.

    21
+    5
______



and someone went OH MY GOD!!! Is this going to be on the test?!?

Where are all of these 'no children left behind' kids when school was in?

Triple Test Day

We had 3 exams today, the hardest week we've had. I missed one question on one test that I'm aware of.

Next week I'm going to start carpooling with 2 other ladies from town.  They are there consistently and early so I'm ok to do it.

Our big presentation is due 2 weeks from today, and a couple of the students were not even aware of it. The teacher has talked about it, handed out a calendar with every thing that's due and when, and I've been working on my internal organs in between class sessions and they've seen it.

"What presentation?  OMG! When?  OMG!  I guess I'd better figure out what I'm doing!! OMG!

During our off time between tests, I asked to see the other people's power point presentations we had to do for computer basics.  So, we all had a little show and tell.  I showed mine, which was about alcohol and titled "Pickled"  with the quote from AA that is "Once you're a pickle you can't ever go back to being a cucumber again".  Lots of questions and quite a lively discussion!

Study Groups....meh

So, I met with my study group and know I know why I study alone.

What's "Otorhinolaryngology"?

(blank stare, then smile)

Well, what is it?

(...smile fades.)

"Hey, do you have any good books to read just for fun?"

Suddenly.....a strange thing.

Working away in the computer lab and I over hear a classmate talking about his resume.  I offer a little help, and in a few minutes he's had a little help and is happy.

about an hour later he leans over and asks "Will you join our study group tomorrow?"

"Ok, I can do about 90 minutes"

"YESSSSS!"


That felt gooood.  

Killing time in Computer Lab

Some guy who is not in my class was sitting next to me in the very crowded computer lab.  He was bored.  He had an official drug manual next to him on the desk, and his phone was in his lap.  I heard  him typing furiously and looked over to see this:

"DLIVSFPOU4Q23T898RGSDLKFNASDLKFUFLJSDLJFDAOSDFJA;SK'RFFOIJGLDKFJADFJALSDJFAOFJG;WLJBAKFAODALKMFAGJADLJGADKFAKDSJF"

I have not seen anyone over the age of 10 ever do that.

How many times do I have to TELL YOU????

Talkity talk talk talk yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkitty "Class, please keep it down" Talkity talk talk talk yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk talk talk yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk talk talk yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk talk talk yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk talk talk yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkitty "Class, please keep it down" yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk talk talk yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk talk tyack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk talk talk yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk talk tyack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk talk talk yack yakkitty yak blah talk yakkity talkkittyTalkity talk tal


SHUT. UP. NOW.  I know now that my path that lead me to not be a teacher was the correct one.

Quietly Smoking Everyone

2nd week, and my grades are a solid 99%. I feel triumphant.

Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water.....

Computer Basics Class!

Hey, it's 2012~ we've all had our own computers for years now, the internet is everywhere and technology. Computer basics should be a snap, right?

wrong, WRONG!!!

It would be a snap if only we as a class could pay attention for 2 seconds, keep our mouths shut for 2 more, and follow both written and oral instructions given not only to the group but to individuals!

What should have been an easy 5 minute start up took nearly 2 hours. I would not be a patient teacher.

Would. Not. At. All.

Phrase of the Day

We're talking about the circulatory system,  and one of the girls said "What happens when your veins go up?"

"Go Up?'
"Yeah, like when you work out and they go up?"
"Oh! ok. Well that's natural...."

"Well, how to you get it to stop, it's SUPER CREEPY!!"

Then..... like some form of viral turrets'.... that became the phrase of the day "It's SUPER CREEPY"

First Little Project

I have a little Time Management presentation in the morning.  Here's the trifold thing, and I'll have a little handout.


It feels juvenile and simplistic to me, but I've seen what the teacher wants. Plus, good things for me to remember.

First Week Grade = 98%

A Spelling Test and a general test were scored together. I missed 1 of the 60 questions.  The test was multiple choice on one of those old "Scantron" cards.  I haven't touched one of those in years.

The class had to watch this AWFUL video of how to be a professional in today's medical world. So much emphasis was put on not using your cell phone at work.  There were some fairly silly examples of behavior - hitting on patients - gossiping about them in the hall, etc. All seemed fairly straightforward.

I'm getting to know some of the students and some are fascinating and very nice. One is a young woman who calls herself a 'Candy Girl'. I had to look it up. She's a hard core raver. We talked about Seattle's rave culture and the drugs involved. Apparently here they use some form of Meth mixed with Ecstasy. She explained quite a bit to me, including the fact that she's already buried 2 friends from drugs used. We talked generally about drug use and she doesn't use now. I talked to her about my experiences at a young age with drugs and how happy I was that meth wasn't a huge thing back then.

It was a good week.

What is that strange language?

I was taking notes today, and my classmate looked over, then leaned over to look at what I was writing.

"Is that.....CURSIVE?"
"Yep"
"Hmmmmm, it's pretty."

Back To School after 20+ Years

I started school on Monday to be a Medical Assistant.  I am the oldest student by far in my small class, and it's interesting to see the differences and similarities between my classmates and I.


Yesterday, I trolled my entire class. The teacher was lecturing about study habits and talking about the internet and facebook, so I raised my hand and said "What's Facebook?"


The gasp from the class was priceless, and someone in the back said "NO!" 


I let them off the hook right away, but it was hilarious to me.